Have you ever thought of starting something new...a new hobby, project or career? But you stopped yourself because you thought it would just end in failure and you'd have your heart broken? I've been there many times and it's tough to push past that fear. The unknown can be paralyzing and it's simply easier not to try.
We can get overwhelmed with all there is to do and if we tackle something hard, we tend to busy ourselves with things we think are contributing to that goal. When in reality, we're keeping ourselves standing in one spot. I used to call it procrastination and thought I was just lazy. Once I dug deeper, I realized that I was protecting....or rather, my ego, was protecting me from heart ache.
And not necessarily the romantic heart ache, but that can apply as well. It sure feels the same, right? You start a new relationship and it doesn't work out even though you thought he/she was THE ONE. Cue the tears and pints of ice cream. Or you started that restaurant/clothing store/coffee shop, poured your heart and soul into it, only to see the doors shut seemingly overnight. "Others will think I'm a failure." Cue the tears and pints of ice cream.
Who says you're a failure? Who? I want names. No venture great or small ever starts out perfectly. Trial and error is the name of the game. The commonly used analogy is that it took Edison at least 1,000 tries to get the light bulb right. If and when you learned to ride a bike, you didn't give up after falling down and scraping your knee badly. You kept trying despite the possibility of getting hurt or failing.
"You have to fail to find the new." - Robin Williams
So, why is it different now when we want to pursue a big goal or passion we have? Why do we let outside factors dictate our outcome? Fear...plain and simple. Fear of rejection, ridicule, _____ (fill in the blank.) Hard to admit, but it's there hiding in the shades. And standing up to it, pushing past it doesn't come easy or natural to many in the world. We settle for "good enough", stay stuck in our mindset and let our dreams fade into the background.
The older we get, we unconsciously let the outside world influence that fear. Could be our friends, teachers, loved ones, co-workers, social media, news, political figures, music and even history. If you're reading this post, it's safe to assume that you've lived through at least one bad thing and you're still here. You pushed through that rough patch to live and experience another day, right? Or you had someone in your corner who was a shoulder to lean on when you needed it most. You found a way through the fear and kept going.
As the outside world influences our thoughts, our mindset around what we can and can't do shifts, creating layers upon layers of doubt covering up what it is we want to pursue. That passionate flame dims and we create a new neural pathway to "well, this is good enough I guess."
If I'm one voice for the opposite of "good enough", I'm here to tell you IT DOESN'T HAVE TO BE THAT WAY!! You don't have to settle for "good enough", "just ok", "meh" or any other way you want to phrase it. So what if you try something and it's not right the first time? Do it. Do it. Do it. Write out a message to yourself explaining WHY you want that goal. Stick it in as many places as you can so you see it often. Get into the feeling of it.
What does it look like?
Why does it call to you?
Why do you want to do it?
What would your life be different?
What if you achieved something much greater you hadn't even thought of that made you even more happy?
Holy cow, what a concept.
Let's figure out a way to peel away those layers, those years of stuffing down deep inside what you really want and let that light back out. Wouldn't that be amazing? Mind you, this isn't a one and done concept. It takes work, patience, the right mindset and tools, plus a smidge of faith (in God, the Universal....whatever floats your boat.) But really, it's faith in you.
I support you 100%.